Every time a new episode of the Oprah Winfrey Show airs in 2010, we will blog along with it. If you have plenty of time, read the long version. If you are pressed for time, read the “What we learned today” summary. If you are really, really pressed for time, read the Twitter-sized summary.

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Very Quick Summary

Episode 87: The Farewell Season Begins

Oprah shouts, the audience screams, Oprah cries, the audience cry. Everybody screams.

Episode 85: Sarah Ferguson Speaks Out About the Headline-Making Undercover Video

Being stung by a News of the World journalist has freed Sarah Ferguson from the treadmill of her life.

Episode 84: Women Who Claim They Were Child Brides in the USA

Oprah says that you are not your past, that you can create from now whoever you want to be, even if you were once a child bride.

Episode 83: Oprah Says Goodbye to Nate Berkus: The Grand Finale

Oprah does not like white ceilings and she believes that every Mom needs a wife. Goodbye Nate Berkus!

Episode 82: Julia Roberts and the Men of Eat, Pray, Love

Getting over love and disappointment is everyone’s story, it is universal.

Episode 81: Fridays Live: $266 Million Lottery Winner and Living Legend Dolly Parton

Even Oprah finds it strange that a recent lottery winner said that being on Oprah is a bigger dream for her than winning the lottery.

Episode 80: Oprah and Simon Cowell: The Farewell Interview

Oprah says that we are all more alike than we are different. Brits and Americans. Babies of the world.

Episode 79: Bret Michaels’ First TV Interview and Country Star Chely Wright Comes Out

What matters in the end, is not money or your career, but your family and good friends.

Episode 78: Held Captive for 140 Days: Lisa Ling’s Sister Breaks Her Silence

We are all alike in our hearts but not in our hair, says Oprah. (With the possible exception of the North Korean government).

Episode 77: Will Smith, Jada Pinkett-Smith and the Whole Family

Will Smith and family  believe in greatness and achieving dreams through hard work, excellence and a roadmap to success.

Episode 76: Oprah Fridays LIVE: Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz

Tom Cruise is the best person that he has ever met, with the possible exception of his wife, kids and Oprah.

Episode 72: Harpo Hookups – Cher, Justin Timberlake, Will.i.am, Usher

The audience in the Oprah Show scream loudly and for a long time when they see celebrities. Especially ones who have just paid off their mortgage.

Episode 71: From Radio City Music Hall in New York City, Christina Aguilera

Apparently animal prints go with nothing yet update everything, nude shoes make you look thinner and taller, and every woman needs a sequined scarf and white jeans.

Episode 70: A Tumor Covered Half Her Face And the Brothers Who Nearly Starved

It is inconceivable that a couple would adopt children only to starve and beat them. It is utterly inconceivable that this would merit only a 4 year stint in prison.

Episode 69: Oprah’s Make Over My Man Crew Strikes Again

Pay attention, dress well, follow fashion (not too much), be polite and well-groomed to live your best life.

Episode 68: Former First Lady Laura Bush, Plus Twins Jenna and Barbara

Since leaving the White House, the Bush family listen to music, eat, talk, laugh and do rented puzzles-  they are in bed by 9pm.

Episode 67: Supermodel Naomi Campbell

Naomi Campbell is beautiful yet angry person who is striving to be better and to find peace.

Episode 66: National No Phone Zone Day

No conversation or text is worth risking lives. Take the No Phone Zone Pledge at Oprah.com.

Episode 65: Rielle Hunter’s First Television Interview

Any issues you may have with the John Edwards/ Rielle Hunter affair/ pregnancy/ cover-up, are to do with you, and that doesn’t have to do with Rielle, because you don’t know her.

Episode 64: Former Miss USA Tara Conner Comes Clean, Plus Todd Bridges

If you are a poster child for child stars gone bad, you may always be remembered for your mistakes.

Episode 63: A Rhodes Scholar, A Convicted Murderer: The Ultimate Twist of Fate

Other people share your name! Google them! They are just like you! Or you know, maybe they are not.

Episode 62: Celebrities Go Back to Their First Jobs

Celebrities are just like us! They had first jobs too! They worked in banks & grocery stores. And now how they laugh at the pitiful money they used to make.

Episode 61: Fridays Live with Jordan’s Queen Rania and Melissa Etheridge

Queen Raina tweets, Melissa Etheridge sings and Dakota Fanning acts to connect with their fans.

Episode 60: Oprah’s Earth Day Mom Swap: An Eye-Opening Intervention

Don’t be ignorant. Reduce, reuse and recycle. Be humane, don’t slaughter animals or pollute the oceans.

Episode 59: Glamorous, High-Flying, Action-Packed Dream Jobs

You might not know what it is yet, but you can get your dream job by working hard at something that you love so much that it isn’t work to you.

Episode 58: The Controversial Octuplet Mom Nadya Suleman

Living in a house with 14 kids is not in any way peaceful, calm or restful.

Episode 57: Accused of Molesting Her, Mo’Nique’s Brother Comes Forward

Mo’Nique was sexually abused as a child by her older brother  Gerald who now has a spiritual advisor and wants to apologize and say he feels her pain.

Episode 56: Sir Elton John and Oscar Winner Russell Crowe

Elton John and Russell Crowe are Oprah’s special friends.

Episode 55: Stay Alive

We are the only animals who will ignore our intuition and walk into the fear: every 4 hours a woman in the US is killed by her partner.

Episode 54: Oprah’s Million-Dollar Announcement and Billionaire Richard Branson

Richard Branson is very, very, very rich. And yet he is only the 212th richest person in the world.

Episode 53: Superstar Mary J Blige & Malaak Rock

God told Mary J Blige she could get out of the projects by revealing sunshine on a cloudy day.

Episode 52: The Most Dangerous Child Sex Offenders in America

A child sexual predator may be in your house. Be ultra vigilant. Teach your kids that they have their own power.

Episode 51: Oprah Fridays: Superstar Kenny Chesney

Kenny Chesney and his fans have a unique love affair. He even loves those who celebrate his birthday and have a life size cut out of him in their tiki bar basement.

Episode 49:  TV’s Most Talked About Show: The Cast of Glee

Glee shows that the uncool can be cool. Oprah thinks that is so cool.

Episode 48: Funny People

Steve Carrel and Tina Fey improv-dance spectacularly well when instructed to be “sex robots” and to do the “sexy worm”.

Episode 47: Humdinger Follow-Ups

God, God God, Jesus, addiction, recovery, God.

Episode 46: Janet Jackson and Tyler Perry

Janet Jackson and Oprah Winfrey are both close friends with Tyler Perry, but probably not with each other.

Episode 44: Ryan Seacrest and Jamie Oliver Join Forces

Own what food you put in your body. Use real food and taste your food. It is wonderful, nutritious and colorful.

Episode 43: Celebs Dig Up Their Family Secrets

Celebrities are just like us. Some of them are even related. They have famous, important relatives too.

Episode 42: Oprah’s Annual After-Oscar Party 2010

At the Oscars, Sandra Bullock felt the presence of her deceased mother, Jeff Bridges felt his parents and Mo’Nique felt Hattie McDaniels.

Episode 41: Fridays Live with Diane Sawyer and Alicia Keyes

The way to stay grounded is to take what you have to give and share it with the world.

Episode 40: 43 Hours Lost At Sea: The Sole Survivor of the NFL Boating Tragedy

When something so awful has happened that you don’t know what to say, say something, even if you are saying that you don’t know what to say.

Episode 39: Jessica Simpson is Ready to Go Public

Oprah says that beauty is all an illusion, it’s what we says it is, or what others say it is.

Episode 38: Roger Ebert Speaks for the First Time

If ever you should find yourself in Nelson Mandela’s house, it is best to sit quietly and listen.

Episode 37: Jerry Seinfeld: The Marriage Ref

Jerry Seinfeld says that animals need to have expressive faces in order to qualify as a pet.

Episode 36: Oprah’s Wowie-Kazowie Auction

Spice colors look good on everyone,  saffron and paprika are the new neutral.

Episode 35: Kirstie Alley: Inside Her Big, Big Life

Kirstie Alley has created her own weightloss program and is following it on her own reality TV show.

Episode 34: Sex, Lies and Scandal

Sometimes you make a decision, and you’re in a mess, and the mess just gets messier and messier.

Episode 33: Amanda Knox’s Family Speak Out

In the US we are used to having two sides to every story, over there, pretty much anyone can make up anything and they’ll print it in the papers.

Episode 32: That’s Incredible!

America is the greatest country in the world,  we can do great things here that are really big or fast or scary or made out of chocolate.

Episode 31: Fridays Live with Shaun White

The Olympics are awesome, winning gold feels great, there is some stylish souvenir clothing, most of which Oprah now owns.

Episode 30: Miraculous Family Reunions

Make peace with your loved ones: If you wait for timing to be everything, you’ll end up with nothing.

Episode 29: Serial Killer John Wayne Gacy’s Sister & Mass Murderer Jim Jones’ Son Speak Out

Even the most reviled, infamous people in history can find  forgiveness from their family.

Episode 28: Make-Unders: How’d You Get That Way?

Too much make-up is aging, too much clutter is messy. Edit, edit,edit.

Episode 27: Raped By His Mother- A Victim Comes Forward

The shame of sexual abuse is crushing and is what destroys you. The shame changes what you are as a human being.

Episode 26: Happy Valentine’s Day- Oprah Fridays LIVE

The Superbowl was awesome, the Olympics will be too. Lionel Ritchie wishes everyone a Happy Valentine’s Day.

Episode 25: The High School Quarterback Who Became A Lesbian

The person that everybody wants to be  may not want to be that person; be true to yourself.

Episode 24: Celine Dion’s Showstopping Surprise

Women in Arab countries are just like Western women, they sing along with Celine Dion songs too.

Episode 23: Lisa Ling Goes Inside the Secret World of a Modern Geisha and a Real-Life Nunnery

Oprah says the best thing about being a nun is wearing sensible shoes.

Episode 22: Oprah & A No Holds Barred Conversation With Child Molesters

Trust your instincts. When a child is abused, it changes who they are, it kills their spirit.

Episode 21: Oprah Fridays Live

The way to The Rock’s heart is not via a tattoo of his face on your thigh.

Episode 20: America’s Silent Killer: Oprah and Dr OZ Want To Save Your Life

Women who drink one can of soda a day, increase their risk of type 2 diabetes by 83%.

Episode 19: Stars of Reality TV: Fantasia’s Comeback and Ruby’s Revelations

Don’t be the sole breadwinner in a house of 6 capable adults. Food is food, not love.

Episode 18: The Children of Elizabeth Smart’s Kidnapper Speak Out

It is our mammalian instinct to protect and care for our children, when that doesn’t happen something is very wrong.

Episode 17: Undercover Boss

Work hard and you will be rewarded. Keep hoping your coworker is actually your very rich boss.

Episode 16: Happy Birthday Oprah! Fridays LIVE

Oprah’s birthday wish: sign the no-phone car-zone pledge, and get a puppy from a no-kill shelter.

Episode 15: Jay Leno: The Tonight Show Fiasco

Jay Leno does not feel responsible for Conan O’Brien’s disappointment; TV is ultimately all about the ratings.

Episode 14: Before You Grocery Shop Again… Food 101, With Michael Pollan

Eat food, mostly plants, not too much

Episode 13: Denise Richards and Mrs Ted Haggard: Surviving a Public Scandal

Drugs and homosexual sexual immorality can lead to a stronger, better marriage with more love.

Episode 12: Rosie O’Donnell: Life After The Breakup and Her New Love

What has healed Rosie is a willingness to step out of her history and into her present.

Epidode 11: Sarah Palin and Her Daughter Bristol

Just because you are a teenage single parent, doesn’t mean you can’t be the poster child for abstinence.

Episode 10: Life and Death Interventions

Addiction is a disease which can be treated, but be honest- your secrets will keep you sick.

Episode 9: Help the Victims in Haiti

Haiti needs a new infrastructure to end their apocalypse. Wyclef Jean is on a mission from God.

Episode 8: Big Breaks with Adam Lambert and Susan Boyle

Dream big, surrender your dream to God, he can dream bigger dreams for you, if your dreams are pure.

Episode 7: This Show Could Save Your Life: America’s New Deadly Obsession

Don’t tempt fate, that text or call can wait. Believe it.

Episode 6: Oprah Fridays Live

Be good to your parents, be good to yourself, celebrate yourself, go see Avatar.

Episode 5: Nate Teams Up with the Millionaire Matchmaker

Finding a partner is not the same as buying a car or ordering a pizza.

Episode 4: Marriage Around The World

All arrangements can work out, we are all different. Thank God we live in the USA.

Episode 3: From 52, Feeling Frumpy to Fabulous! Look Great at Every Age Makeovers

Be cute for you! Find your own style! But follow the  rules and never let your hair go grey.

Episode 2: A Family Stripped Down: Peter Walsh Moves In

If you spend time together, eat healthy and be active then it will all work out.

Episode 1: Ultimate Betrayal: How She Discovered Her Dead Husband’s Mistresses

A liar lies, a cheater cheats, watch out for red flags and trendy shoes. Don’t give up on you whatever you do.