Every time a new episode of the Oprah Winfrey Show airs in 2010, we will blog along with it. If you have plenty of time, read the long version. If you are pressed for time, read the “What we learned today” summary. If you are really, really pressed for time, read the Twitter-sized summary.

Date: March 4th, 2010
File Under: Grief, Public Service Announcement, Tragedy
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Episode 40: 43 Hours Lost At Sea: The Sole Survivor of the NFL Boating Tragedy

Oprah says that behind the scenes of the show, they have been talking about this story for months. This story is a complicated story of survival, it is hard to tell but they are going to try and honor everybody involved. It happened over a period of 43 hours and they are going to start at the beginning.

Nick Schuyler a personal trainer, had befriended NFL players Corey Smith and Marquis Cooper at his gym. Marquis was married with a 3-year-old daughter he adored. An experienced fisherman, he often took friends out on his 21-foot boat. Corey, the youngest of six from a tight-knight family, had just finished his season with the Detroit Lions. At the last minute, Nick invited his best friend, Will Bleakley, to join them.

On a chilly Saturday morning the men left a launch in Clearwater, Florida, at 6:30 a.m. They dropped anchor 70 miles away off the Gulf of Mexico. In late afternoon, when the weather turned, they decided to turn back. And then disaster struck. The boat flipped, tossing all 4 into the rough open water 70 miles from the shore. When the group didn’t return home, Marquis’ friend called the coastguard at 1.27am. The coastguard began the search but they only knew that the boat was a single engine boat, they knew the size and the passengers, but not the location. Nick’s sister got the call on Sunday morning that they were missing. Their Mom knew instantly that something had happened to Nick.

Coast guards helicopters planes and boats faced grueling conditions and 14 feet waves. Looking for the white speck of the upturned boat was like looking for a fingernail in a shag carpet. Overnight temps dropped to 40 degrees, hypothermia became a major concern.  “All the processes in the body just slow down, so your mind starts to slow down and you cannot think,” Dr. Mark Rumbak says. “One of the main symptoms of hypothermia is the hallucinations, and you could become very aggressive. You could just start fighting and you could start beating somebody up, or just slipping off your clothes and just running away. You just become very confused and could do something that may, in fact, cause your death.”

When reporters found out that 2 NFL players were missing, it triggered a media frenzy. Nick’s mother was beside herself. She remembers thinking that if they don’t find them when its light, they’ll be in trouble.

On Monday morning, the weather finally broke and the Coast Guard intensified their search. After days of searching for over 2 days for more than 24,000 square miles of ocean, a lookout made a miraculous discovery at 11:46 a.m. “It turned out to be the white upside-down hull of the boat,” Capt. Close says. “Then they saw Nick sitting there with his life jacket.”

Theres’ only one person who knows what happened on that boat. The sole survivor, Nick Schuyler is here today, welcome Nick. Oprah says that it was a boys trip and at some point Nick became sea sick, so he had his ski jacket on.  Everyone else wore wind pants and wind jackets. Marquis had shorts on. They knew a storm was coming and they had talked about not going out so far. Still, Nick says they decided to go all the way out. It was one of Marquis’ favorite spots. Nick says he’s not an avid fisherman, but Marquis knew what he was doing. It was his last weekend before he left to Oakland for camp, and he wanted to make one last trip.

Around 4pm they realized that they needed to head back. When Marquis decided to turn the boat around they realized the anchor was stuck. Nick says the same thing happened the week before when he, Corey and Marquis were fishing in the same spot. They had to cut the line and leave the anchor behind.  This time, Nick says Marquis didn’t want to lose another anchor. They tried a couple different maneuvers and turned the boat around and pulled it from every which angle. The anchor’s rope was attached to the front of the boat. Will suggested untying the rope, reattaching it to the back and gunning the engine to move the anchor. “Our intention was, ‘Okay, if we gun the motor, we’re either going to rip this thing out or the line’s going to snap,’” Nick says. Oprah asks why they didn’t cut it like the previous week- they didn’t want to waste another $200. No one thought that it would flip the boat or that it was a dangerous move.

As Marquis gunned the engine, Nick says the boat began to flip. “Marquis was driving. Within maybe two seconds, it slowly flipped over to the left. The water was very cold, 64-degrees. They attempted to flip it back, there’s nothing to hold on to, there’s no leverage. Physics worked against them. They were in shock. The waves were already crashing in, they were tired and didn’t have life jackets on.

The tragedy made headlines around the world. With the lifejackets trapped underneath the boat, they were left stranded clinging to the boat. Oprah says that the book is one of the most harrowing stories of survival that she has ever read.

Nick says Marquis kept apologizing. ‘I’m so sorry you guys,’ Marquis said after about a half hour in the water. He must have said it ten times, he felt it was his fault because he was the captain. There’s these stories out there that Marquis was an inexperienced boater, which is absolutely not the truth. He knew what he was doing. He had been on the water a hundred times, a thousand times, and he was an experienced fisherman. Who would think that a 1” rope would flip this boat with 4 big guys on it? In the beginning they thought they’d get out of it. Oprah asks if they had been drinking. Cory didn’t drink, Marquis was leaving town so Nick had thought they’d have a whole lot of beer and that Cory would drive the boat back. But with the conditions, that was not the case- Nick had 2 beers over 4 or 5 hours. Everyone was coherent when this happened.

Will took charge and took off his clothes to swim under the boat. Marquis would give instructions and Will would go and look. He was able to swim underneath the boat several times and retrieved three life vests and a floating seat cushion. Nick says Will gave everyone a life jacket and strapped the seat cushion onto his own back. That’s quite a friend says Oprah. Absolutely says Nick.

As darkness fell, Nick says the men assumed their positions on and around the boat. They worked together through the night to help each other. Marquis was face-down, straddling a cooler on top of the exposed bow. Nick was next to Marquis, crouching with one foot on the hull of the boat and the other on the swim platform. At Nick’s feet, Will perched on the swim platform next to the engine. At Marquis’ feet, Corey held on to the boat, the only one submerged in water.

Oprah reads an extract from the book on page 49 stating that Marquis was insecure. As conditions deteriorated, the waves threw them from the boat over and over again. “We’d hear them approach and scream, ‘Hold on,’ trying to brace ourselves.” It was like trying to ride a bucking bronco. Marquis must have come off the boat 20 or 30 times. Nick probably came off 15, sometimes you’d be thrown off just as you were climbing back on. There was a grim determination and a lot of Oh my God’s. At first they were Oh my God I can’t believe this is happening, and then they were Oh my God this might be it.

By about 10pm that night they realized that it was deeply serious. Nick says Corey kept stating, ‘No way in hell I’m going out like this.’ Corey had a waterproof watch on with a light so they could keep track of time. Oprah says at some point Will brought up a bag of cellphones. Yes, says Nick, Will was able to find a ziplock bag with cell phones- without Will, Nick wouldn’t be here today. Nick was trying to make calls or texts to 911, and all it says was ‘Connecting, connecting, connecting,’. He was trying to conserve the battery but also hoped that they’d float closer to a cell phone tower.

Nick has written about his terrifying ordeal in the book Not Without Hope. After 9 hours in the sea, Marquis and Corey started to show signs of hypothermia, like aggression and disorientation. Oprah remembers that at 2.30am they noticed a change in Marquis. They’d been talking through the night, but then Marquis began to get very quiet. “So we’d be like: ‘Coop! Coop!’ And he wouldn’t answer at first. … Some time would pass, 10 seconds later… ‘Yeah, I’m all right.’ They didn’t think anything of it, they were frightened but were thinking that they’d be rescued. They knew that Marquis’ wife would call at midnight if they weren’t back.

Nick says they talked about their families and what they would change in their lives. Will had mentioned stuff about being closer to his brother, Blake. Marquis just talked about how much he loved his family and Delaney, his little girl. They all had a million thoughts going on that this could be it.

Marquis started to lose some motor functions, and he started to foam at the mouth. Nick says Marquis also began to hallucinate. He kept saying things like: ‘I need to get underneath the boat. I need to cut the rope. I need to get the anchor,’ Nick says. At that point, he knew, okay, we’re in deep trouble. That wasn’t Marquis. That’s not the kind of guy he is. The elements were definitely taking him in.

They were being pounded by the waves and taking in salt water. They show again the footage of the doctor saying that hypothermia may make you do things which will endanger your life. Nick says he did everything he could to keep Marquis from leaving the boat. He positioned himself up on the boat where he straddled the motor. He had pulled him up with the help of the other guys, and pretty much bear hugged him. Around 4 a.m. on Sunday, Nick was still holding onto Marquis. They had been in this position for roughly over an hour, and it was a fight to hold him down; he was trying to struggle to get away. They were all saying to him ‘Hold on. They’ll be here any minute. Relax, Coop. You’re good. We’ve got the anchor.’

Oprah asks Nick to talk about letting go of Marquis. Nick and Will had checked Marquis’ pulse a few times, and then Will said, ‘He’s not there.’ At that point, they tried to flip him over and give him CPR, which was virtually impossible with the waves. The hypothermia was setting in with Corey, who was becoming disorientated; aggressive and pulling on all of them. Nick said Corey was starting to fight as well, whichwas not Corey. “The hypothermia was definitely set in,” he says. “There was no way that I could hold onto Corey and Marquis at the same time.” Nick had to decide what to do. Nick says he faced an impossible decision. If he didn’t let Marquis’ body go, he couldn’t help Corey. If he held on, he could lose them both. ‘I just kept telling Coop, ‘Coop, I’m so sorry,’ he says. Will said that he had to let Marquis go, and Nick agreed. It was the worse thing. He let him go, and Marquis slowly sunk. He rolled off Nick’s right side and Nick watched him until he couldn’t see him anymore.

Oprah asks if there was a moment to grieve- no Corey was much more verbal and aggressive than Marquis had been. He was very aggressive, screaming. Saying some things that they had never heard Corey even joke about. Which, once again, was not Corey. He said things like I’m going to kill you, clarifies Oprah. He said things that were hard to take in, but it is hard to forget the last words says Nick. Oprah says that he was literally out of his mind. Yes, says Nick and he was literally using his legs to leapfrog off the boat. Nick was holding on with his right hand, and Corey was shooting, so he was literally ripping Nick’s arm trying to get away. He had jumped one time across the back of the motor, and he had sliced my hand, sliced my arm on the motor prop, Nick says. In that moment, Nick says he let go of Corey. Corey then jumped into the water. He was roughly 6, 8 feet off the boat and they couldn’t reach him at that point. Corey ripped off his life jacket and rolled his body forward in the water. He kind of did a swan dive and put his feet in the air and just kicked down. They didn’t see him after two seconds.

Nick was left with his best friend in the world. They’d been in the water for 15 hours. Will told Nick something he says he’ll never forget. “He said, ‘I don’t think I’m going to make it another night,’ Nick says he didn’t say anything at first then he said  ‘They’re going to find us today.’

Will began to display the same signs as the others; he wasn’t aggressive, he was helpless. Nick was fending for both of them at that point, they were operating on 20%. The waves continued to batter them, pulling them off the boat and into the cold, churning water. After a while, Will could no longer pull himself back on the boat. He didn’t have the strength. Nick was trying to pull up a 225-pound man with not a whole lot of leverage. Will went in the water one time, and his life jacket shot up. It kind of choked him. His first reaction was, ‘I’m going to take the jacket off.’ So he took the jacket off, and within a few seconds that thing was yards away. I thought about going to get the jacket, but then I’d have to leave Will, jacketless, alone.” Nick held him for some time with the waves banging banging, banging. He was on one side of the motor. Nick was on the other. They both kept going under, and Will was coughing. That happened probably five or six times. Then one time Nick was calling his name, and he was just not there.

Oprah asks if Will had drifted off. No, says Nick  Will was dead. Nick says he fought to hold onto his friend’s body. “I was beyond devastated. I tried to climb back up on the boat holding a literally lifeless body,” he says. “He just got away from me, and there wasn’t a whole lot that I could do.” Nick watched as his friend’s body slowly disappeared into the sea. He had to watch his best friend sit there floating in the water. Before he died. Nick said, ‘I love you, man’, and Will said the same.

Oprah reads some of Nicks thoughts from the book “I needed to live long enough to tell the story, even if I was found alive and died later. I felt useless and worthless. It seemed like every time I thought it couldn’t get worse, it got worse. I hoped I would be found, but I experienced what no person should have to experience. It was awful. Three are gone. Now it’s my turn. It’s just a matter of time. I didn’t have any choice but to go on.”

Being sick and the jacket probably saved his life, his mom gave him the jacket. He was alone from Sunday night. “I was very sad,” he says. “I kept thinking about the guys, of course, and my family.”  Oprah says did he ask his Aunt and God if they were up there to help him? Yes. Nick started to say his final prayers. “I kept picturing my family, my mother, particularly,” he says. “I just could not picture my mother attending my funeral. That’s by far the worst thing that any mother would have to go through.”

He never gave up hope, but to see three guys die in his arms, three athletes, and he already had been so sick before they started. Nick says he saw the Coast Guard’s boat approaching but thought it was a hallucination. He was hunched over, “I was like, ‘There’s no way,’” he says. “I kind of stood up for a second and I’m like, ‘Thank you, God.’ I took my jacket off, swung it around like a towel, and I just broke down.”

The lives of the men who died at sea will be remembered for much more than the accident which took their lives. Corey’s family are very proud of his achievements and say that he is deeply missed. His coach at the Detroit Lions says that his heart was bigger than everyone else’s. Marquis Cooper was his parents pride and his sisters biggest fan. His wife misses his smile and his gentle spirit and his daughter Delaney was the joy of his life.

Will Bleakley’s mom, Betty, says her son had a twinkle in his eye and made everything fun. She’s grateful she told Will she loved him the last time she talked to him.

Oprah asks what Nick told Will’s parents about the day he died. He was in the hospital the second day and he knew it was one of those things he had to do. “I wanted to emphasize how without Will, I would not be having this conversation with you right now. Will saved my life.”

Oprah says that there has been controversy over the book. Some of the family members involved believe Nick is profiting from their tragedy. Nick says that he has heard some things too and that unfortunately his relationships with some of the families aren’t where he would like them to be. But at the end of the day, “I’ve said since day one, the most important thing for me has been the Bleakleys, the Smiths, the Coopers and the three guys.”

A few months after the accident, Nick was approached and they said, ‘Here’s the deal: They’re gonna do a book, with or without you,’” he says. “I wanted to do it for the right reasons, for the three guys and their families.” Oprah asks about the money. He has set up a foundation and is giving to charities. Unfortunately he has not been able to speak with the families. The money has never been a thing. He didn’t want to talk about it at first because it was so fresh, a year ago but it feels like a month.

Corey’s family have said that Nick’s depiction of Corey’s last hours as aggressive was not the Corey that they knew. Nick repeatedly stated that it was not the Corey he knew. Corey was the big teddy bear that everyone loved.

Marquis’ wife Rebecca asked Oprah to read following statement: “The last morning I saw Marquis, I kissed him goodbye and told him I loved him, as I have for years. My family and I didn’t get the chance to bring him home, to lay him to rest. I’ve heard conflicting reports stemming from Mr. Schuyler of what happened on the day Marquis, Corey and Will died, but never once heard or been told of my husband’s last words, whether he spoke of Delaney and I. How is it that Mr. Schuyler has enough recollection and material to write a book, yet has never once sat down with our family to tell us how Marquis died?  Marquis was not an inexperienced boater or a careless friend. He was a husband worth fighting for in life, and in his absence still today.”

The hardest thing right now for Nick is this relationship. He has talked to Will’s parents and two of Corey’s sisters and that “More than anything in this world, I would love to tell her the story, and I’ve always wanted to tell her the story,” he says. “I’m willing to do whatever it takes.” The setting was never right to have the conversation, even though they were friendly after the accident. Oprah says this is a lesson everyone facing loss can learn from. “For everybody, there comes a moment when things need to be said and everybody always wants to know the answer to the question, ‘Why?’ … Particularly when somebody dies or there’s an awkward situation. You don’t know what to say, so you end up saying nothing. And then that nothing ends up creating really bad feelings because somebody should have said something, and nobody really knows what to say. Even if you can, just say, ‘I don’t know what to say.’”

Oprah asks if he misses them. Every day. He had only known Marquis for a little while, and Corey even shorter, but he was with Will 2 or 3 times a week. Oprah asks if he’s ok. His friends and family have been out of this world. “Without them, who knows?”

Nick says one of the reasons he wrote Not Without Hope was to help this happen to anyone else. Here’s what the Coast Guard says everyone should take away from his story:

  • Boaters should always leave a ‘Float Plan’ with someone ashore—including a description of the boat, names of the people onboard, where exactly they are going, and when they are expected back.
  • Boaters should always wear lifejackets.
  • Every boat should carry an Electronic Position Indicating Radiobeacon (EPIRB). An EPIRB is water-activated and will broadcast an exact position via satellite to rescue centers.
  • Visual distress signals such as flares, strobe lights and even flashlights can be critical in helping the Coast Guard find someone in need of assistance.

Oprah thanks Nick and wishes him well. His life is a testament to live more consciously, so please no more texting in the car. Thank you.

WHAT WE LEARNED TODAY:

One of the main symptoms of hypothermia is the hallucinations

Sufferers become very confused and could do something that may, in fact, cause their death.

Seasickness caused Nick Schuyler to put on his ski jacket, which probably saved his life.

Wear life jackets and tell people exactly where you are going when going out to sea.

Watching 3 of your friends die in your arms is incomprehensibly terrible.

A VERY QUICK SUMMARY:

When something so awful has happened that you don’t know what to say, say something, even if you are saying that you don’t know what to say.

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